i masturbate and you should too

2006-11-22T00:37:00.000-07:00

who likes homemade porn?

i do.

2006-11-20T12:33:00.000-07:00

i'm pretty sure us 'easy' girls get a pretty bad rap.

we should be praised for our love of sex and our unwillingness to play games and wait three dates or whatever oprah tells me i'm suppose to do.

i know people like to make that 'self-respect' argument but c'mon...are you serious? i think there's nothing more self-respecting than doing what i want to do. it's not as if i sleep with every single person i meet. i respect myself because i respect my needs.

i'll also respect you because you're making a decision based on what you want not what other people tell you it's 'appropriate' to want.

i hate to break it to you ladies...if all a guy wants from you is sex chances are you'll never hear from again whether you fuck him straight off or after the cosmo-approved three dates. jerks are jerks.

that's all i wanted to say. be nice to the 'easy' girls cuz they're the ones who like giving head. that being said boys, don't assume you're getting laid. assume that and you'll probably go home alone to jerk off and wish you'd hit the easy girl.

xo a.

2006-11-11T16:35:00.000-07:00

i am soaking wet and i want to invite you over here to my office to fuck me. i imagine you coming over and without a word propping me up on the nearest desk, ripping my pants off and devouring me.

i want you right now. right in this office. i want to wrap my lips and my tight pussy around your perfect cock and fuck you all afternoon.

i want you to ruin me.

are you in?

2006-11-08T00:24:00.000-07:00

Sex and moving on...

The end of an affair.

To be more specific...the well negotiated and amicable end of and affair. These are not easy things to come by, to be sure...and rarely easy things to endure,even in the best of situations.

But I think the hardest thing to think about, is something that actually came up while 'negotiating' the end of this affair. There we sat, both relieved, but depressed. Melancholic, yet resigned...trying desperately to lighten the situation, so neither of us would irrationally change our minds. He made a joke...kind of a sad ironic statement, meant to make me laugh - or to plant the seeds for us to lagh a out it later perhaps...but it got me thinking...

The fact is, that people grow used to each other - moreover, that we may grow so accustomed, so attuned to one another's' bodies in a physical relationship...that even if the emotions are under control, it becomes difficult to move on purely because of the depth of physical intimacy.

I hadn't really thought about it; He brought it up - but we'd invested a good 8 months into one another. About half of those were exclusive, the other half, well...essentially so also. And it struck me...that of all the experiences, openness, and of all the lovers I have ever had...the consistency of one partner (and one consistently good partner on top of all that...) was something entirely new to me.

I didn't realize it while it was happening...I didn't even think about it until the reality of its conclusion dawned on me.

Yes, there was Love involved. But it makes sense to me that that Love will translate into a fantastic friendship. What my BODY and MIND are having trouble doing...is attaching any sexual or physical pleasure...any mere thought of either really...to anything but him. I want sex with him. I want that intimacy, that knowledge and that attunedness we both acquired over 8 months...

Certainly, I have fantasies...memories...desires to draw from. I have porn, erotica, toys and a healthy appetite for all those things- But they are not fulfilling. They are more fulfilling, certainly, than some random encounter with someone (old or new...) but on the whole...they leave me non-plussed.

Maybe this is all part of getting over someone. And maybe it will all drift away as things become easier between us...I certainly hope so. But all I know right now, is that the only thing that seems to turn me on right now, is the idea of having familiar, loving, sweaty, hot sex with the one person who is really not available to me any longer.

And I am terribly frustrated!

BUT - I can also put a positive spin on it and say...maybe I'm all growed up now and know what I want. Maybe I am realizing that as exciting and freewheeling as it is to give and receive love to many...that what I really want is to put all my eggs in one basket. So to speak.

Then again...maybe I'm just crazy and all I need is for someone to fuck my brains out and bring me back to my senses.

If only I thought it would be that easy...

2006-11-05T22:34:00.000-07:00

i haven't had a sleepover in a long time.

i love waking up with the taste of cock in my mouth and messy hair and a sense of satisfaction.

i love that sometimes anal sex is the only option.

i love when it's all completely unexpected.

2006-10-26T01:24:00.000-06:00

i'm about to head off to bed but this will be keeping me awake for a little while.

god, it's been too long since i've had a delicious cock in my mouth.

xo

2006-10-20T23:35:00.000-06:00

I love when men taste like beer when I kiss them. There's something so masculine and delicious about it all. I also love (although it may be a cliche scent) Aqua Di Gio for men. Just the smell of this particular cologne and I'm ready for business. Open, and ready for business. It's such an oldie, but good Lord, my reaction to it never changes.

I also love when guys put their arm around your waist in public. Just that little touch of the PDA is so sweet. With a few double dream dates on the go, one must savour every little piece of action...how else can you make an acceptable decision on whom to befriend in the bedroom?

While we're on the topic...how do you choose who enters the promised land? Through a lottery? By smell? By height? By personality? If they have a pulse? Money? Do tell!

2006-10-14T01:18:00.000-06:00

i want to have sex so badly. it's been close to or just about two months and i'm climbing the fucking walls.

if i don't get a cock stuck inside me soon (any hole, really) i might die. literally die.

2006-09-28T15:20:00.000-06:00

in my mind it goes something like this:

it's a normal appointment. a random monday afternoon and a chilly fall day. i'm wearing a warm sweater with a strapless tank top underneath.

i enter the shop and the door jangles. i've overcome by the joy of familiarity. the hummm of the needles, the muffled cries of pain, the smell of cleaning products and sweat and blood. i'm home.

for the next couple of hours i know where i'll be: warm and bleeding under his strong, trusting hand.

he welcomes me with a big hug. we haven't seen each other for a while. i forgot how big he was and how little i feel all wrapped up in his big arms.

'have a seat kitten'

i sit. he gets ready and i lay back anticipating the first glorious sting of the needle. we chat. nothing is out of the ordinary.

suddenly the first line passes across my skin and i feel a little rush. he moves my hand so my arm is in the perfect position. i feel the tips of my fingers brush against the inside of his thigh. i can tell he notices but doesn't say anything. i feel my cheeks flush. my body reminds me of how hot he is.

my hand continues to brush against his thigh as he puts more and more pressure on my arm. he shifts his chair slightly and i brush my fingertips across the crotch of his shorts. he doesn't object but hold my arm in a position that keeps my fingers there-lightly brushing against his cock.

"hey kitten" he says, "look out"

i look down and see that he's starting to get hard. still he keeps my hand there. he isn't tattooing my arm anymore and i feel myself turn my arm over and gently reach out to stroke his growing erection.

before i things go any further he pushes back his chair and says to me too loudly, "alice, do you want some more privacy since you aren't feeling well"

"oh, yes please!" i say- my voice catching in my throat.

suddenly we are 'protected' by leopard print walls on all three sides. the fourth side is a full length mirror. i can only imagine what's to come.

"before we begin" he says, "we need to take care of that arm"

i nod.

as gently as he can he grabs both my arms at the wrist and a roll of paper surgical tape and tapes both my arms at the wrist to the chair.

"but" i stutter..."what can i do without my hands?"

before i can say anything more he leans over and kisses me. i see his suddenly huge erection poking into the side of the chair. i long to reach out for it but i can't. he did a good job of taping my hands to the chair.

i can feel my own pussy starting to swell and moisten with every kiss. his hands are everywhere but where i want them to be. even with my jeans still on he avoids my wet pussy teasing me. he pulls down my strapless top and bra and starts kissing and sucking on my nipples. his tongue on my nipples makes me anxious for him to suck on my clit.

"i want your cock in my mouth" i tell him.

"really?" he says. he stands up, checks the mirror to make sure we're still 'alone'. i had forgotten momentarily about the people in the shop all around us and being suddenly reminded of them made this whole thing more exciting.

"really" i respond.

"well then..." he undoes his belt and pulls his shorts down to reveal the hugest cock i have ever seen. his hard-on grows as he sees the look of hunger on my face.

"mmm" i mutter. i can't wait to taste that giant cock and feel it against the back of my throat.

he moves the chair so i am sitting upright and straddles me.

"open wide" he says.

i open mouth willingly and he inserts his huge hard cock in as far as it will go. he starts of slowly but the more i moan the harder he fucks my mouth. i am gagging and drooling and i can feel my pussy exploding in my jeans. i feel his the underside of his cock spasm against my tongue and just then he stops.

"not yet"

he gets off the chair and i close my eyes. i feel his hands at my waist, unbuckling my belt and jeans. he pulls off my jeans and underwear in one swooping motion and i let out a huge sigh. the anticipation of him deep inside me is killing me. i raise my knee up placing my feet on the chair inviting him to play and explore my soaking cunt.

he touches me gently at first but i want more.

"fuck me" i say. my body is ready for him.

"not yet kitten, we've got to get you ready". he then touches my clit gently and i moan loudly. i know one more touch and i will come. he reaches up and cups his hand over my mouth.

with his other hand he explores all the caverns of my soaking wet pussy. he enters me slowly at first with two fingers while his thumb works at my clit. i writhe moaning into his hand and come instantly. he doesn't stop pushing forward and finger fucking me hard. suddenly i feel his thumbs replaced by his tonge and lips on my clit. he is sucking on my clit and i can feel myself close to coming again. he slips his fingers back inside me and strokes the inside of my pussy.

"can i stick a finger in your asshole?" he asks. i nod. "ok" he says, " i have to take my hard away, promise you won't scream?" i nod. he removes his hand and with the newly free hand he places one finger gently inside my ass. i moan quietly shifting my hips to show i approve of the new addition. he goes down on me finger fucking my ass and pussy and i come two more times. i finally can't take it anymore,

"fuck me now!" i say. "i want that huge cock inside me"

he stops finger fucking me and gets up. he goes over to his table and grabs a condom from inside his drawer and then, grabbing me by the waist flips me over onto my stomach. the paper rips from around my wrists leaving me free to touch my wet, swollen pussy while he puts a condom on. i pull myself up onto my knees holding onto the chair with my 'bad' arm and fingering myself with the other. he watches me for a minute gently stroking his own cock.

he then grabs me with a strong arm around my waist and slides his huge cock deep inside me. i feel like i'm being ripped open by pleasure. he is so huge and him deep inside me from behind is perfect. i come almost instantly but he keeps going, a hand over my mouth again to keep me from screaming. he bends me over and sticks two fingers deep inside my asshole as he fucks me.

he fucks me hard and i am screaming into the inside of his palm, biting it, clawing at the black leather chair, and finally i cum one last time. he stays inside me for a second longer and i need the chair to hold me up. i am fully spent. in a wave of pleasure he pulls out and turns me gently back onto my back facing him.

"but what about me?" he says, "i'm not finished."

i look down at his still hard cock, reach out with my hand, slide the condom off and invite him to my mouth. i am struck by a second wave of desire to taste his hot sticky cum and let it run down my chin.

"i want you to cum all over my face"

with this invitation he fucks me hard, wanting to cum, wanting to see me with his hot sticky juice all over his face.

"i'm cumming!" he says and pulls his cock almost fully out of my mouth blowing his load all over my tongue and lips. he pulls out further releasing the final load on my cheek. it's hot and wet and i look in the mirror...

i see him behind me, holding his cock and he looks as satisfied as i feel.

"well, shall we get back to work?" he asks.

"i need a minute" i try to stand and find my pants but i'm dizzy and i need to sit down again. he smiles at me, a proud look on his face, "not bad for an old guy?"

"not bad at all"

i get dressed, he cleans up, and we get back to work.

getting tattooed is suddenly way more awesome than i ever remember.

***

someday...

2006-08-31T00:41:00.000-06:00

just moments ago on msn the lovely lovely biff and i were chatting about life, love and the pursuit of great sex. i'd come to a realisation about my current sexual practices and decided to share them with biff (in context of course)...anyways, our conversation headed down a weird path so i thought i should share the highlights with you:

[...]
alice: so how are you biff?
biff: i'm fuckin' excellent, in fact.
alice: excellent. that's excellent.
biff: it sure is!
[...]
biff: how goes?
alice: eh... i'm feeling weird these days. and i had this big epiphany related to relationships and sex and shit which has left me glad and frustrated at the same time
biff: how so?
alice: i just decided, that JUST sex isn't enough. so i'm not doing it anymore (or at least not for a while...) i don't remember what it feels like to fuck someone i really like. that's fucking depressing. so yay for that and boo for not having sex
biff: that's interesting... I haven't yet come to that conclusion... but i'll let you know when I do.
alice: ha ha.
[...]
biff: you just need to stop having "completely detached" sex you know? there has to be some faint connection there.
alice: yeah, i think that's more what i meant.
biff: that's why i'm paraphrasing!
alice: ha ha. truthfully, i wouldn't mind actually really liking the person first... i haven't done that for a while.
biff: yeah, that's neat too
there were tears says:
not all the time but y'know.
alice: ...unless i could be guarenteed fantastic sex. then...well, all bets are off.
biff: yes;.. that would be ideal
alice: i know someone like that. a spectacular asshole but so amazing in bed i don't even care.
biff: hahahahaha! that's a hilarious way of putting it.
alice: ha ha. it's the only way. he takes plain old asshole-isms and raises them to the level of art. he lives with someone, came to my show (a girl he's fucked on numerous occasions) and brought a date (who isn't his girlfriend)...
biff: hahahaha! he sounds awesome.
alice: there's definately SOMETHING about him. i think his totally callous nature is what makes him so attractive. his abject indifference is so appealing
biff: why do girls love jerks?
alice: i don't love jerks. i just fuck them
biff: hahahahaha
alice: but here's the thing...guys like that know EXACTLY what to say and how to say it. nice guys get sorta awkward and bumbling and that's cute but sometimes you want some fucking asshole with too much confidence for his own good to tell you they want to fuck you in the ass...
biff: hahahahahaha, jesus, i'm laughing my head off. wicked. tell it like it is!
alice: what else can i do? would i date someone who, over drinks, asks me how my gag reflex is? no, but they can sure come home with me that night...
biff: no ones ever asked you that over drinks, have they?
alice: that dude, the jerk, actually did that. we were walking down the street and he asked me how it was
biff: wow.
alice: after drinks but yeah... we stopped and we making out or whatever and he stuck his finger down my throat and asked me how my gag reflex was...ON THE STREET
biff: hahahahahahahaha ahahahahahaha...wicked!!
alice: come to think of it it was a little...wow. aren't you curious how i responded?
biff: uh, yeah!
alice: ha ha. i said, 'well, you could come over and find out...' and then i bit my lip and looked at the ground. ha ha.
biff: hahahaahaha.... it's like you were in a weird Showcase-style porno movie.
alice: I KNOW! everything was like a porn with that dude. EVERYTHING.
hey, can i use this conversation in a blog post?
biff: doooooo eeeeeet... pseudonym please.
alice: of course.
biff: i need to maintain my blognonimity.
alice: it's for my sex blog
[...]

the end.

it was a fun conversation; and it's true, sometimes all i want is an overconfident asshole to fuck me til i can't walk and then ignore me til he wants to do it again. SOMETIMES...

xo alice. (and biff...)

2006-08-14T00:40:00.000-06:00

are phyllis and i the only people who have anything to say about sex?

hmmm...

anyways, you know what i absolutely adore? i love masturbating while all wrapped up in my duvet. when i'm done i'm all sweaty and hot and feel like i've just been wrapped up in pleasure.

i just came so hard my head aches. i'm not even kidding...

2006-08-11T15:52:00.000-06:00

talking with rrrrred today on msn about what different kinds of booze/drugs make us horny got me thinking...

how many times have you been in a situation that could have escalated into something much more exciting than drunken flirting only to let it pass you buy because of whatever?

it's happened to me a bunch. times when i should have sent that txt message or kissed that person or just said, 'i'd like to go home with you please' or whatever. if it doesn't pan out you can always write it off as drunked lunacy right?

i'm reminded of one specific night. booze. weed. and the perfect company left me a sopping wet mess. i was stupid and i have no idea if what happened was anything more than what i assumed it to be at the time but looking back i hit myself. HARD. what an idiot i was for not giving it a shot...or at least putting the thought out there into the ether and see if they pick up on it.

that night, the night i'm thinking of specifically, man, i would have DONE anything asked of me. oh, you want to cum all over my face? yes please
oh, you want to tape us fucking? yes please
oh, you want to fuck me in the ass? yes please.

i would have gotten on my knees and fucking begged for it if asked...seriously.

ok. the end. i'm getting wet just thinking about it.
later friends.

2006-08-09T16:57:00.000-06:00

Here's one for the boys. Not to be confused with the 1984 classic "Let's Hear It For the Boy", but rather a calling to all boys to answer the following question:

If you see two girls in the bar, (at the beach, the party, wherever the occasion may be) and they are both pretty, but one is clearly hotter than the other, will you try your luck with the less pretty one because you think you have a better shot? Do you feel that because the other girl is hotter, you blow her off, thinking that she is automatically out of your league?

I need answers. Now.

2006-07-30T00:04:00.000-06:00

gah! i NEED to get laid. it's been too long since my last...'roll in the hay' and i'm starting to go a little stir crazy. fortunately these past three weeks have been completely batshit insane and i haven't had to sleep, think or eat much less fuck. so i take solace in that.

that being said my three weeks of business is going on a tiny vacation and is going to have a new place to christen.

...here's hoping.

all that aside i have a question i'd like to pose to you fair readers and contributors:

threesomes.

currently 'threesome' is still on my list of "never dones" but the thought was recently suggested to me and i remain curious.

if there is ANYTHING i've learned in the past three weeks and throughout my 'dating' history it's that one can plan and legislate the details as much as they want but how does one plan and legislate how it's going to feel (emotionally) when it happening or over?

i mean, what if you got jealous of your partner and how much attention they were getting or the fact that they really seemed to enjoy that new body?

i wonder if threesomes aren't a cleverly designed rouse to actually have your cake and eat it too. to cheat without cheating?

i dunno...i'm just thinking.

thought? please discuss. anonymously or openly. i'm definately curious about the emotional and physical logistics of the whole thing.

2006-07-29T21:24:00.000-06:00

So the Ron Burgandy Speed Date actually turned into me getting sloppily drunk and eating Purdy's chocolates at 3 in the morning. My period helped nothing, except for reassuring me that one day I may be able to bear a child. The gentleman turned out to be more of a cousin than a potential fling, and I'm pretty sure I have blue ovaries.

Guys can have blue balls, so girls can have blue ovaries. Or fallopian tubes. Or whatever.

Now then. For a new question that has nothing to do with menstruation.

How old is too old? I'm nearing the 23rd year of my existence on this fair planet, and I had always thought that 28 was my absolute max. A few nights ago I broke this standard and hopped, skipped, and jumped to 31. There was no sex in the champagne room, as I started to really think about the years on this particular make and model. I know, I'm making sex with an older guy sound like buying a used car. But seriously...I don't know who rode in it before, if it's been smoked in, if it's been beaten up or abused... I mean, is there even a warranty? Has it been certified and checked by top mechanics?

Maybe I should stick with the newer models...but I'm not sure. Everyone loves a classic don't they? All I know for sure is that I'm not buying. I'm renting at the most...and it's too far into the summer to sign a lease.

Beep beep I'm a Jeep.

2006-07-10T22:16:00.000-06:00

Girls, you know how your period gives you some kind of weird confidence? The kind where you seriously don't give a shit about anything and you eat 23 chocolate chip cookies and wear sweatpants and tell little kids to fuck off? That kind of confidence? Maybe it's the hormones, I can't really be sure...

Anyways, I was sitting there, eating a chocolate chip cookie, in my sweatpants, with an Always regular absorbancy pad lining my panties and a Playtex regular absorbant tampon in my vagina... and I was just like "I'm calling him right now".

So I did. And now I have a date for tomorrow. God...I'm like Ron Burgandy on speed...I have all the confidence I need. This is amazing.

Has this ever happened to anyone else?

2006-07-09T23:54:00.000-06:00

here's a game.

everyone's playing it and i figured what the hell, we should play too.

so the purpose of this little game/excercise/whathaveyou is a chance to tell a secret and get something off your chest. this is sex blog so y'know, maybe something related to sex would be cool but if you want to post something else that's rad too.

so, what you do is leave us a comment, anonymous or not, and tell a secret...anything you want. we don't have an ip tracker so your secret is safe.

have fun and make 'em good folks.
there'll be some of mine in there for sure.

xo alice.

2006-07-09T00:11:00.000-06:00

when i lost my virginity it didn't hurt. at all. seriously, there was no blood, no tears, no whimpers and no 'pushing through the pain hoping it'll get better'. it was pretty much awesome from the beginning.

anal sex on the other hand. OUCH!

i was down with a finger (or two?). that was AWESOME.
the new trick to the best head ever: the right amount of suction and a little double penetration with a coupla digits per hole.

the thing is it's not that his cock in there didn't feel good, cuz it did, but there was a point when it just hurt too much. i think with a coupla drinks i'd be good to go. it's something i was curious about before and now it's something i'd DEFINATELY like to explore further.

fuck, last night was fantastic. thanks you. what's next? ; )

xo a.

2006-07-04T20:04:00.000-06:00

Discussion Post
Topic: Hair down there

When I plan to be with a guy I make time to shave down there. Needless to say, my de-fuzzing schedule does not always coincide with opportunity. This makes it a little difficult for impromptu flings (like Alice’s) to occur.

I would love to know everyone’s experience and opinion on:
- What guys think about fuzz vs fuzzless
- Your favourite methods
- Bikini line tips (mine is nothing but trouble)

2006-07-03T22:52:00.000-06:00

saturday evening: canada day.
why do holidays seem to end in sex for me?

christmas eve, boxing day, new years eve, good friday and now, canada day. the festive spirit just overcomes people i guess.

so, it's all in the details right?

i get home from a great evening of drinks with some very cool cats and i'm a bit horny. it's hot, we'd been talking about sex all night and i decided to get a little stoned and watch porn. the usual when i'm expecting to be getting myself off in a few minutes.

msn username: what's wrong with a little choking?

and of course i meant choking while fucking, not choking in general.

so my 'provocative' username led to a conversation with someone i haven't seen/fucked in a LONG time. he discussed the merits of gagging vs. choking. he preferred gagging. i knew this about him. needless to say i offered up my services for some gagging knowing where that little (welcomed) humilation would end.

him: do you have a backyard?
me: yep.
him: is it lit?
me: i think my downstairs neighbours have motion lights
him: well, you're going to go down on me either beside or behind your house. do you own a skirt?
me: yep!
him: well wear it so i can see you play with yourself while you're going down on me.
me: ok...(i'm already fucking WET at this point, by the way...)
him: see you in 15!

HOLY FUCK!

so i put a skirt on and sit and wait. door knocks. i take my time getting to the door but as soon as i open it i'm reminded of my insane attraction to him. he grabs me and kisses me. we stand in the doorway making out for a couple of minutes but it's not long before my hand gravitates to his cock. he's already hard and i can't resist so i go down on him, in the open doorway on my porch.

it's 2:30am. there aren't that many people out and about but we hear some people see, i think i hear a whistle, but i don't care. i'm so turned on by sucking his cock and i'm kneeling there thinking i could do it forever.

we move inside to the living room and he sits down on the couch. i can't take my eyes of his huge hard cock. i go back to work. there are tears running down my cheeks and i am so fucking wet. i start playing with myself as i go down on him and when i take my hand away he rubs my clit on the outside of my panties with his foot. i want him inside me so badly.

eventually he grabs me by the hair and pulls me up and we go to bedroom. he doesn't go down on me but he doesn't need to and i don't want him to. i know that he'll make me cum because he's not afraid to fuck me hard. and...he'll fuck til i cum.

so he fucks me. hard. and it's good. he varies the rhythm, the depth the speed. there's teeth and finger nails and screams of pleasure...and it's not all just him fucking me. it's not making love either but there are moments of intimacy. i love when someone's inside me and they kiss me. a slow slow insertion accompnied by a kiss...mmmmm...

so i cum. i feel my entire body tense and i know i am going to have trouble walking. i cum, hard and i feel the muscles loosen around his cock. he keeps going and the sensitivity that usually makes me uncomfortable made me want him deeper in me and to never stop. his cock is my favourite cock to date.

it's not about love or friendship or any of those things. it's ONLY about the cock. shallow? maybe...whorey? maybe.

anyways, back on topic. so i cum and soon he grabs me and i scramble up so my mouth meets his cock. he comes in my mouth and it's warm and i swallow it with pleasure.

he lays down beside me. neither one of can really walk and i can't really talk much. but it's nice. i know he isn't going to stay (and that's fine) and we kiss a little and talk and touch arms and shoulders and he looks at my cd collection and we talk about the matt webb poster i have and he got dressed and left. we said goodbye with a kiss on the porch and it's done.

as he leaves...

me: don't get jumped by a frat boy on your way home
him: i don't even care anymore, i just had good sex.

coming from him that's a huge compliment.

my legs are jelly at this point so i go to bed and pass out on my sheets that smell like sweat and cum and i am happy.

yesterday i was sore. SORE.
hips, hamstrings, vag, arms...my entire body was sore, seriously.

fantastic!
i hope you all had an equally wonderful canada day.

xo alice.

2006-07-01T12:31:00.000-06:00

He came into my house, his 6’2” frame filling up the space in the hallway. The black cloth of his t-shirt hugged his chest and showed off the tattoos on his arms. He looked a little uncertain, a mixture of desire and apology for the past written on his face. Truly, at that moment I did not care for the past. I only knew that I wanted him now, like I wanted him before, but never let myself. I slipped my hand in his and led him to the bedroom where I bid him to lay beside me. I couldn’t help but stare at the gorgeous structure of his face. No face had ever elicited such wanting in me before. And now, I could have it. I took his face in my hands and kissed him on the mouth. He returned the kiss, but too gently. He didn’t want to hurt me, I knew, but for me a little rough play is never amiss. I pulled his face to mine harder and slipped my tongue into his mouth to encourage his. Understanding, he wrapped his long arms around me, crushing my body to his, letting me feel his wanting for me. One large hand slid under the fabric of my shirt, and under my bra. Fingers rubbed against my nipple. He knew just how to touch me and I couldn’t take it anymore. Warmth spread through me as I came.

Then I woke up. I felt as languid and satisfied as I would have felt after a physically induced orgasm. Now I have the urge to contact the man in my dream, and thank him even though I haven’t seen him for over two years. : )

I have recently become celibate and this is far from the only dream I’ve had like this (with different people, in different shapes and forms). Is this my body’s way of compensating for something I no longer receive on a regular basis? Have any of you experienced similar dreams, and if so, how vivid/real are they?

2006-06-27T23:52:00.000-06:00

a translation:

...

in the appropriate context can be translated into the following:

me. on my knees. at your feet. biting my bottom lip. your cock in my hand. my eyes telling you, 'i've never done this before but gosh, it sure looks fun".

simple, no?

2006-06-19T21:14:00.000-06:00

ok... so even though the Oilers just lost the cup (gods damn it all to heck) I still propose a mass orgy.

after all... these guys are going to need a bit of a pick up (no pun intended) if they're going to actually 'go all the way' next year.

right? right?

2006-06-16T16:14:00.000-06:00

i just bought a new vibrator.

yay!

2006-06-14T22:15:00.000-06:00

there is a dirty picture at the end of this post that is NOT safe for work...just so you know.

moving along.

my name is alice.

i am going to be 25 in less than 3 months.

i am a fucking MORON!

friday i had a little 'nooner' with someone i'd fucked before. this 'someone i'd fucked before' is in a relationship. this isn't something i want to talk about right now. i feel like i've talked this issue to fucking death right now. justifications can come at another time. let the 'slut' comments fly, i've heard it all before...

fuck, none of this is even the point. i just need something simple. and i know getting involved with involved people isn't simple but FUCK we were amicable (almost friends) before and now there's all this stupid awkwardness and it just isn't necessary. that's fucking it. i'm done.

DONE.

...i'd still like to have sex though. (even with him...)

xo alice.

p.s. WELCOME the lovely A. to our little orgy. ha ha. here's a welcome picture. enjoy!

courtesy of my favourite: burning angel.

2006-06-05T23:32:00.000-06:00

Newsflash: Ty Conklin is not invited to the Oilgy. That douchebag just cost us the first game.

2006-06-05T02:40:00.000-06:00

as to not overshadow phyllis' post i just want to say that i met someone tonight that i absolutely would have gone home with in a fucking millisecond.

that's all.

2006-06-04T02:57:00.000-06:00

Good touch, bad touch. How do you decide? How do you know what feels good and what is inappropriate? Some people (including myself) may think that any touch is a good touch. Well...that is what I used to think. Actually, that's a lie. I know where my Mommy/Daddy areas are located. DON'T TOUCH THEM unless I tell you that it is alright to do so. It's 3:21 am and the idea of people reaching for my crotch in broad daylight is really something funny to picture.

First though, let us clear up some issues I have with the sun. I have just arrived home from sunny Mexico, and my pubis region has taken quite a beating. No, not from sexual escapades...the resort we were at was for newly married couples and then old wrinkly married couples. It was pretty disgusting, because my brother and I were being mistaken for husband and wife. Even one of the bartenders asked my bro, "Hey mang, why don' choo talk to your wife? She sure looking lonely over there." To which he responded by barfing on the man's face while trying to choke out "SISTER...euugghh hack....EERKK...she's my SISTER!".

Anyways...back to the pubis story. I had freshly shaven this zone in order to not look like the Kokanee sasquatch whilst wearing a bikini. Everything was looking in tip-top shape...except for a nasty little ingrown on the right hand side. To make a long story short, my suit shifted while I was resting on the lounger, and the sunblock-free pubis zone *complete with ingrown hair* was torched to an unrecognizable crisp.

Sunburned ingrown = bad touch.

Also: awkward moment made more awkward....

Full body massage on the beach+eager cabana boy named Davido+gust of wind+light blankets+me flipping onto my back= you guessed it....nipplegate.

It is already daunting enough to have a strange man's oily hands all over your body, caressing and massaging your hamstrings and upper breastal region...but did he really have to see my left nipple? Why did God blow his mighty wind to embarrass me on my vacation?

These are questions I will never have answered. The massage ended with Davido asking if I was 24, and then commenting on my beautiful blue eyes. I was tempted to give him a flash of the crispified ingrown, to repel his desperate attempts to see my right nipple. However, I was still dazed from the experience, and replied with "I'm 22, thanks for the massage." I peaced-out of there like Rosie O'Donnell running towards a lesbian covered in cheesecake.

Now before I leave you with all these wonderful images, a question I have for you!
Who here is self-conscious about their body? Do you find that this body part interferes with your ability to fully "let go" when you are doing the nasty?

2006-05-25T14:35:00.000-06:00

there's this boy. i don't him very well-i think we've met once. i've seen him in a bunch of stuff and around town from time to time. this boy makes me wet. instantly wet.

i saw him yesterday at oodle noodle while waiting for some disappointing pad thai and i literally almost came in my pants whilst waiting. he was waiting too, for what, i don't know...

i imagine him coming up to me, telling me he's seen me around town and at openings and at shows and finds me really attractive. i look him straight in the eye and tell him that every time i see him i want nothing more than to fuck him til i can't speak. i tell him i got wet when i heard the bells chime on the door announcing his presense. he grabs my hand and places it on his cock. he's half-hard already. just to prolong the tease we wait for our food and chat about theatre. i can barely contain my arousal and i see him shift in his seat trying to hide his growing erection. i live only blocks away so we decide to go there. we run to my car and before we get in it he grabs me and slams me against the passenger side door kissing me hard and reaching a hand down my pants. it's broad daylight and people pass us on the street as we're groping at each other.

we get to my place and barely make it in the front door. we tear each other's clothes off and as i take down his pants in the doorway i see how hard he is and how big he is and i can't resist. i go down on him immediately. his huge cock in my mouth only confirms how much i've wanted him. he stops me after a few seconds pulls me up and drags me over to the couch. he throws me down on the couch and starts eating my pussy. he goes down on me with the perfect amount of pressure and hand/mouth co-ordination. i can tell he loves my piercing and uses it to it's fullest advantage. i come quickly. hard. but i'm not done. i still want to taste his cock and i need him to fuck me. i push him backwards onto the floor and go to work with my hands and mouth all over his gorgeous cock again. i can taste how much he loves it. his hips begin to buck and i let him fuck my face-hard. he's moaning and fucking me so hard.

i push him off me because i want his cock deep inside me. he sits up, spins me around and bends me over the couch. his cock slides in easily and fills my throbbing pussy easily. as he fucks me i play with my clit and i know i am going to come again soon. i do. hard again but i'm still not satisfied and i want him inside me longer. he flips me over onto my back, throws my legs over my shoulders and fucks me harder than i have ever been fucked before. i am screaming at the top of my lungs thanking god that no one else is home. suddenly my insides feel as if they are about to explode and just as i think i can't feel any better or come any harder he pulls out and i squirt everywhere. that's never happened to me before and i tell him so. he's proud of himself. he tells me he's ready to come and as a reward for making me cum so deliciously hard i let him come all over my face.

afterwards neither of us can walk very far so we gather up our clothes and head into the bedroom. we talk for a few minutes but within a short amount of time he kisses me gently and i feel myself wanting him again and i can feel his cock slowly hardening against my thigh. i know, in that instant, that i am not going to make it rehearsal...

god! i wish. that is what i wish every time i see this guy!
every single fucking time.

2006-05-18T10:03:00.000-06:00

well kids, i finally did it. i got my hood pierced. eeps!
read all about it here.

warning: UNSAFE FOR WORK!

xo xo alice.

2006-05-15T00:13:00.000-06:00

Ahh yes. Stanley Cum Playoffs. Sumptuous, sweaty hockey players gliding to sexual ice glory. Alice and I have decided we are going to have an Edmonton Oilgy, which is basically a massive orgy with all of the Oilers. We figure that we will need to clinically stretch our vaginas because Laraque is probably the size of a watermelon. If you look to the picture on the left here, try to imagine yourself naked, in the middle of this tight knit circle of godmen. Exciting, no?

However, after tonight's game, I don't need lubricant to get wet. I've got a natural oilslick going on in my pants right this second. Also: during the pounding process, we need to have the entire team there. It has to be a team effort, because that is what leads the Oilers to gratification, on and off the ice. It's not enough to just get pronged by Pronger, you need a little love from everyone.

Oh yeah, all they are allowed to wear are their skates. With skate guards of course. Or their helmets...bashing your noggin on the headboard can cause serious damage. GO OILERS!

2006-05-12T10:12:00.000-06:00

i haven't had sex with a 19 year old for a couple of years and he'd be probably 21 or 22 now. 19 is young, pervy young, right?

but he'll be 20 before i'm 25 so does that make it ok?

i just want to do the dirtiest things to that little baby-faced (and completely legal) little boy.
i can picture him standing over me and cumming all over my face and when i do all i want to do is get in my car, drive to urge and see if he'll fuck me on the hood of my car in the pouring rain.

god, he's just the cutest little boy ever and while i'm sure he's been with more people than me, i still want to corrupt him, to let him live out all his adolescent fantasies on me. i want him to fuck me like he wants to fuck someone after watching porn.

sigh...HE'S 19!

clitoral hood piercing in t-minus 2 sleeps. eep!

2006-05-08T01:04:00.000-06:00

i'm getting my clitoral hood pierced next sunday.
should be fun/scary/holy fucking shit!

2006-05-03T23:48:00.000-06:00

Sexual embarrassment crushes. I know we all have one. I've shared my secret crush with a few people, and now I will share with you. Here goes...

I would ride Toby Keith until his honkeytonk cowboy penis fell right off. Please don't ask me why. I don't know why this man turns me on so very much. He is a staunch republican who loves the red, white, and blue. He supports the war and likes women who drink whiskey (they also have bellybutton rings and butterfly tattoos). He's also 45, old enough to have spermed me himself. He's also 6'4, and breeds horses. His newest single is something to the tune of "Hey you liberal fuck, eat my shit because it's made of American Pride". I found that quote online, I liked it, so I used it.

If you don't have embarrassment shivers yet, I don't know how you're human. Tell me of your embarrassment crushes! I want to know!

2006-04-28T16:05:00.000-06:00

Have you ever noticed that certain songs, ones that you wouldn't necessarily think of as "sexy", sometimes become sex songs in your head?
I mean, some are obvious. Striptease for example. Obviously a sex song.
But sometimes there are weird ones, ones that are in no way overtly sexual but for you they conjure images of gettin' down and dirty.

For me, it's Brothers on a Hotel Bed. (Not the title folks, the actual song.) I don't know why, but that song always makes me want to get it on!
Weird eh?

Anyone else? Any other good ones?

2006-04-26T01:18:00.000-06:00

so i'm sorta fucked.

and not in the good way. not in the way this blog deems i should be.

so a while back. like a year ago, almost, i met this guy and we had sex and it was fantastic and he has the hugest penis i have ever gagged on and he made me cum harder than anyone ever has. we fucked again around christmas and then the shit hit the fan. long story. don't want to go into it. let's just say after all the shit he's still my benchmark. he is the boy upon all other boys will be judged and i hate that that boy is such a shit.

anyways, we might be doing a little project together. something that's 'mutually beneficial' (and unrelated to sex) and it's going to kill me.

the problem is i have NEVER been so sexually attracted to someone in my whole entire life. i drive past him and i want to pull over grab him, pull him into the car and fuck the afternoon away. ugh! but at the same EXACT second i am hating him more and more. the angrier i get the more i want to fuck him and wanting to fuck him makes me angry.

i dunno. he's just so amazing. he fucks me like like some metaphor i can't even make up words for. i can't of think of something dirty enough...it's aggressive without being uncomfortable or violent. it's almost sweet. my legs don't work and english doesn't come easy after that boy's inside me.

GOD! too bad he's such a raging dickhead.

oh, and i had a little chat with that boy i fucked last week and after complimenting me on my 'tight pussy' he said the following:

and i could have probably spent another day or two between your legs enjoying your taste.

too bad his very new girlfriend makes him want to 'live'-whatever the fuck that means.

oh and all this and i haven't had an orgasm since...wednesday. i'd better get fucking on that one. that i can take care of.

2006-04-24T19:13:00.000-06:00

Poop. It comes out of your bum. It is waste. It is the matter that your body discharges from the bowel after food has been digested.

So why, can someone please tell me why, some people find it sexually arousing to put the stuff in their mouths and smear it all over their bodies?

Like I was wondering with the "waterproof" sex toys, have any of these people died from playing with sex poop? E-coli? Nasty diseases? Seriously, it's filthy! I don't understand. I do understand that taking a dump can feel good and relieving...but in your MOUTH??? No. Why. It can't taste good.

I seriously wonder if any scheizer porn stars get sick from playing with all that shit.

2006-04-19T14:07:00.000-06:00

here's the thing. i was never lonely before i let someone spend the night. once you know the feeling of having someone so close to you all night. the feeling of waking up wrapped up so tight in someone's arms. the feeling of knowing that when you get out of the shower they'll still be there waiting to wrap you up again and kiss you. but now i know how that feels and i can't shake wanting that. i was ok until i felt that safe. that close. and now that seems to far off and all it makes me want to do is cry.

this is a lonliness i have never felt. it's terrifying and overwhelming and completely all-consuming. i can actually feel it. pin point it. and it makes me sadder than i have ever been.

truthfully, no one had ever spent the night. we'd have fun and he'd leave and i was good with that. when they stay and hold onto you all night long you start to realise what you've been missing. i'd blocked so much of the past and that first love out of my head that i'd forgotten what that feels like. and that's the part that sucks.

all that italicized stuff is what led to this entry. this is repost from my other blog but perhaps more appropos here...

so girls can, just as easily as guys, have 'fuck buddies' but i'm willing to wager that there are rules. or, at least there are for me.

so here are the rules:

1. fuck friendship. we are not 'friends with benefits' we're people who know each other and are attracted to each other and have sex but do not date. if i wanted to hang out with you and fuck you i'd probably just try to date you. (now obviously this is different from when you get wasted and have sex with a good friend...)

2. don't get jealous, possesive or tell me about the other girls you're fucking.

3. call me when you want sex and i'll do the same. it works.

4. there will be no sleepovers unless one (or both) of us is too drunk to move. if that happens there is NO snuggling. snuggling results in attachment.

5. the dirtier the sex the better. please do not try to 'make love' to me. we're fuck buddies and therefore we fuck! it's a-ok with me if you want to cum all over my face, y'know...

6. should we happen to bump into each other in public and decide to meet up later we will NOT leave together but a quickie in the bathroom is always an option.

7. be well kept. i'm not your girlfriend and i still care what you look, smell, and taste like. love hasn't made that shit obsolete for us.

8. there is no us.

9. don't call me if it's not strictly for sex.

10. getting me stoned will always work in your favour.

11. according to maxim 'the more piercings a girl has the more places she'll let you stick it'...i have nine. assume nothing because you read maxim.

and last but not least...

12. you must NOT have a tiny penis and you MUST give amazing head. bad head will get you kicked out! (and vice versa i assume, yeah?)

i guess i just felt that in light of recent events i needed to get some of this off my chest and yes, this is a bit tounge-n-cheek or whatever but there's so much floating around in my head right now that i just wanted to write about it...

xo xo alice.

2006-04-18T18:06:00.000-06:00

Purity... what does that word mean exactly?

The other day at work, as I was trying to act all innocent and shocked when someone made some sort of off colour comment, one of the ladies called me sweet and "pure". I laughed at the time, as I am quite fond of the lady who said it, and really didn't feel like dropping her opinion of me, but it really made me stop and think; why is it that I need to be worried about if she thinks I'm 'pure' or not?
It's interesting to think about how archaic the connotations behind that word are. Pure ivory soap means no bad chemicals in it, pure milk chocolate means all choco and nothing but, but a pure person? It's rare to hear a boy called pure... so what exactly does it mean when applied to a female?
Pure=innocent? naive? virginal?
Why is it that because I'm really none of these things, I'm no longer Pure? Am I dirty somehow because I've had sex with a handful of people? Or do I loose my purity at just one? And why, WHY praytell, is that a bad thing?

It's funny really... we look at people who are innocent in the same way that we look at bunnies: cute, but not a lot of brain power. (At the same time, there's the ol' saying "f*cking like rabbits... funny that...) I don't particularity want to be associated with that type of connotation. I want to be sweet, sure, and I don't mind being cute, but I've earned my experience and damn well enjoyed doing it.

It seems to me that the concept of purity is a rather outdated one at best, heralding back to a time when women were supposed to (key word here, supposed) be with only one man, and the idea of a pure woman was one who had never broken that trust (or her hymen for that matter). But in modern times that seems foolish to me. We pride ourselves so much on being an open culture; why can't the concept of PURE WOMAN update as well.

PURE WOMAN.

I like that.
I don't care what anyone says, I'm a pure woman. Not clean and tidy, not innocent, naive or virginal - a little ratty on the edges, sexy when she wants to be, sweet, bitchy, bouncy, ridiculous. Everything. All.
P-U-R-E.

Now, why can't we all just think of it that way?

2006-04-17T23:36:00.000-06:00

Okay...now I know there will be some division on this one.

Sex in public places, can you diggit? Cause I can't. I can moon and flash people any day of the week (and that's mostly to scare them, not for sexual purposes) but I don't think I could ever have full on sex in a public place.

I've given head in a dozen random vehicles (one or two while he was driving, naughty me) but have never done the dirty deed outside of the comfortable surroundings of drywall (ie, inside a house). I've done it lots of places inside the house, but have never been brave enough to take it outside.

The chance of getting caught is just too much for me to think about. It would plague my mind and I wouldn't open up. I bet I'd be as tight as a lid on an old jar of pickles. No one would be getting in there.

Alice I know has done the outdoor sexcapade...but I want to know if I'm seriously in the minority here.

2006-04-16T00:13:00.000-06:00

i forget to tell you the best part:

he went down on me with the blinds open!!

... and for those of you who don't know, my window faces out onto the street (as opposed to the back yard).

it wasn't until i'd come and was sucking his cock that the blinds were actually closed.

2006-04-15T02:01:00.000-06:00

i'm feeling the post-coital bliss right now.

a few hours after some of the best head i've ever gotten and good solid (albeit quick) fuck i'm still feeling the positive after affects...

i love the way sex feels in the moment, obviously, but there's something to be said for the feeling that sticks around afterwards. my skin is still sensitive and every touch feels a little warmer and harder and a little more present.

it had been 3 months and 14days and thank fucking christ that on this easter friday i get to restart the counter. shit, it hasn't even been 12 hours yet...

here's to happy a long weekend full of fantastic sex for all of you!

xo xo xo
alice.

2006-04-13T00:10:00.000-06:00

a poem:

Fledgling

Shaking like a newborn

It's hard to speak English
After a fuck like that.

-Mingus Tourette.

I FUCKING WISH!

2006-04-11T22:23:00.000-06:00

I was just thinking about sex toys that are approved for the bathtub. Has there ever been an occasion where these vibrators and other such stimulators malfunction, and give the user a little bit more of a shock than they are supposed to experience through orgasm alone?

Fuck, that would be so funny! Well not if they got hurt, but they were in the tub, with bubbles and candles, and the soft hum from the toy resonating on the tile walls. She moans softly...mmmmm oh yeah......that feels sooooo OW! FUCK OWOWOWOWOW!!!! Shit! What the fuck just happened?

And all of her pubic hair stands on end.

Please tell me that this has happened to someone, I want to tell people that it actually occurred.

2006-04-10T00:02:00.000-06:00

i've wanted to do this whole sexblog thing for a while not because i'm any sort of expert on the whole thing but because i LOVE sex and i love talking about it.

and here's the thing, we live in an age of confessionalism. it's all about coming clean and making sure that we when we profess something the people we're professing to know all the facts.

so, here are my facts.
i'm 24. 25 soon. not too sure how i feel about that but y'know...age is one of the things i have ZERO control over...
5'7''. apparently this makes me tallish. usually i lie and say i'm 5'6''. for whatever reason it seems to make boys more comfortable.
too many pounds. alright, i'm not sooo into confession that i am going to post my weight all over the internet. i'm working on shedding some of those too many pounds but i still love my body. it loves sex and it's capable of a lot of pleasure. heavier girls have skin and cunts and all those other things that twiggy girls have and they still need/want/are good at sex. trust me on that one...besides, i'm not that fat.
piercings: 9. 4 ears, both nostrils, left conch, both nipples.
tattoos: 5. four small ones and a full right-arm sleeve.
5 male sexual partners. or 4.5...the first time was sort of an in and out thing. he stuck it in freaked out, stuck it in again and that was that. the best time was with a much younger guy (he was 19, i was 23) and it was pretty much about an anonymous as you can get. i knew only his name and how old he was and that he had some amazing genital piercings. generally i think i've been pretty lucky because i can say that in my life i have never had bad sex just bad moments after sex. ha ha!
0 female. yet.
my real name: most of you know it and i only keep it secret out a sense of 'what if my dad google's me?' here's my other blog if you really want to know that stuff about me.

other things:
my first kiss was with a french canadian boy named etienne. i was 11. he was visiting the west from the east. to this day i hear that french canadian accent and i get a little wet.
my first real orgasm was probably when i was about 12, solo. the best solo was one time about two months ago when i got stoned, got off and came for about 20min. straight. the best time with a partner was with a boy with a big cock who made me scream at the top of my fucking lungs. i couldn't have been quiet if i'd wanted to.
i will have sex on the first date if i want to and feel NO guilt about it. i'll also still date the person if he turns out not to be an asshole.
i masturbate everyday and i have an orgasm 99% of the time.

oh, and size absolutely matters. thick cocks rule.
i'm still waiting for a boy that can make me squirt.

so that's what i've got for now. i think we've just got to be open about all this sex stuff, don't we.
i love my body and i love how it can make me feel. i guess i'm just not shy about my sexuality...

2006-04-09T22:55:00.000-06:00

I rarely enjoy oral sex...which is very odd for a woman. At least, from what my friends tell me. I usually won't have a good time unless I'm high on the reefer and relaxed to no end. Thing is, my primary headgiver (let me restate that, my ONLY headgiver) is one I feel very comfortable with. I'm not self-conscious or anything like that, but I don't derive pleasure from it like I would a hard cock.

Strange? Maybe. Comments? Appreciated.

2006-04-09T16:33:00.000-06:00

there are few things that can make a girl feel better about her sexual self as being told he gives really good head.

and truthfully, i choose when someone gets good or bad head. sometimes people just don't deserve a good blowjob.

but sometimes they do.

and when they do, i'm more than pleased to oblige.

i wish more guys knew how to give really good head instead of just thinking they do.

2006-04-07T21:53:00.000-06:00

bonjour, and welcome to our little family!

i started this blog not because i want to be a pornographer (although i might post some links from time to time) but because i have things i want to say about sex that may not have a place on my other blog.

i have also decided to make this a little community blog. afterall, everyone's got something to say about sex so if you want to join and post at your leisure then drop me a comment and we'll figure out a way to get you all signed up whilst maintaining whatever levels of anonymity so desired by all parties.

cool? cool!

enjoy and PLEASE comment at will!

xo xo

alice.